the life of a monk - part 5

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the life of a monk
      part 5

i chose this desolate existence
this lifetime of silence
and locked myself within my head

evening sets like a cloud across the sky
leaving me staring
      in dark wonder as purple melds with blue
      across the horizon
standing at the mouth of the river
      dreamlike
and i turn
      with arms outstretched
as the echo of a solitary loon floats across the water

the spell is broken
and my chains fall from my hands
      my feet

yet silent i return
to my man-made tomb
      the existence i hate
      the life that i created for myself

and in darkness
      the bell tolls once more
      the end of a day
the beginning of this new reality

for my penance is of no consequence
and these prayers need not be silent
      and my torn and bleeding back needs no more scars
      no tracks of flesh and blood

for no matter what i do
on my own

      i cannot save myself











june 20, 200
3:40 pm