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December 30, 2002
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sale of the century

come & buy a ticket
for the low-low cost
of a bit of soul
      and a piece of bread
i can get you
a backstage pass to infinity

come & take my hand
let me lead you onward
towards the inevitable
      and uncertain love
i can take you
through the doorways of my heart

come & lead me on
      into the future



it will only cost you everything





december 30, 2002
11:53 pm
:iconspunj13:
hmm...not sure where this piece came from... it just sort of...bloomed, so-to-speak.. it seems rather straightfoward to me.. but it seems that that may not be the case for everyone else... *shrugs*... i guess everyone sees things differently

//spunj13
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:icontimrkey:
~timrkey Feb 23, 2003   Writer
incredible. +fav
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:iconstellarue:
hmmm...pretty good, i like the style but i dunno this just didnt strike me as complete
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:iconcorporatewhore:
i expected something a little harsher than a piece of bread.

this reminds me of novels i used to read as a child. i love the story in this one because its at teh perfect length, i love the format as always because your format always seems like a staircase and stepping stones in itsself. love is bitter but so beautiful in words.
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:iconnemish:
It always costs everything...
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:icon82deg:
This piece is kinda different from the style you usually use...brief but concise nonetheless...
As i was reading this piece, i pictured a woman smiling cynically as she (pretended) to offer her hand with promises of warmth, hope and love...promises that she never intended to keep...she only seeks gain from it all but give nothing in return...

And at the end of the last stanza...i had one line repeating in my head (i don't know where it came from but it kept ringing very clearly in my head)

'Don't cry...tears are for those that matter.'
Reply
:iconweezergirl123:
This is amazingly beautiful. It seems like it should be a song, thats just my opinion though. Gorgeous piece of work +fav
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:iconmasterfire:
I really like this one, theres just something about it that makes me feel warm inside. I can't really describe it. This really cheered me up, thanks alot. +favs. :D (Big Grin)
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:iconphixion:
~phixion Dec 30, 2002   Writer
Read a few of your other works, none of which struck me as all too captivating. Nothing personal. I can't control my tastes. To each his own. However, I did heartily enjoy this one. Brief, but concise. Keep up the great work. :) (Smile)
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:iconskepeffe:
I've seen that thumbnail all over for the longest time but I never did look at any of your writings, I don't think.

I think this is very well written. I agree that it's blunt, but it just works that way. Imagine it being more descriptive but written basically the same way...something I certainly would have to drudge through unwillingly. There's a lot of feeling in this also, which would've died quickly if it were written with more detail I think.

Great work! :) (Smile)
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:icontraumachamber:
Wow, I like this a lot. Though it seems pretty straightforward to me as well, the message is conveyed in a great way. Great job! :) (Smile)
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